how did you know

i came down to the warehouse and found t'joji, the bodegera, and her assistant busy finalizing the material requests for tomorrow. t'joji was behind the L-shaped counter while her assistant was standing nearby organizing the screws of different sizes in the pigeon hole drawer. both working animatedly and in silence. the only sound in the room was the one coming from the radio-cassette smack right at the middle of table perpendicular to t'joji's. by its looks, worn and torn, you'd wonder if the radio is still working. surprisingly, yes, it still is.

"sir, pakingan nyo ang kanta, sir....ang ganda," t'joji volunteered without looking at me.

"sino yan, te?"

"chicky pineda...dalawang version lang yan...si gary v at sya."

"di mo pa narining ang version ko..." i was talking in between puffs.

"sige nga sir, parinig nga..." excitement was quite pronounced in t'joji's voice and i could see traces of nostalgia in her when our eyes met.

t'joji bowed her head and continue writing. embarrassed perhaps for being transparent with her feelings.

"bakit, te, yun bang nakita mo sa taong pinakasalan mo?" i was referring to the message of the song. there was authority in the tone of my questioning that it puts t'joji instantly right on the defensive. 

the assistant winced but somehow managed an impish smile. 

"ay, naku, sir...yun ang akala  ko noon...kaya ko sya pinakasalan."

not long ago t'joji confided to me the status of her marriage. that's one reason why despite her almost an SC she's still working her butts off. emancipation. 

"nung bagong kasal kami naka-silip ako sa kaleidoscope, kulay bahaghari ang paligid," this time t'joji put down the pen. her gaze passed through me and beyond, "nung naglaon nagsuot na ako ng helmet sa akala na kakayanin ko ang mga pagbabago sa ugali nya," her voice reeked with resentment, "yun pala libog lang."

"di nga ba sabi nila na makikila mo lang talaga ang tunay na pagkatao pag mag-sama na kayo?"

"korak ka jan, sir."

"kaya favor ka sa live-in arrangement?"

my question floated in space for awhile waiting for an answer only to be swept away by unsympathetic wind.

"bat di mo te balikan ang nag-pa-inlab sayo sa ugali nya?"

"para syang de-kolor na nung ikinula, dagling nag-fade." this was followed by a sarcastic laughter. so real the pain i could almost feel it rubbing on my naked flesh. "di nagtagal lumabas ang totoong kulay nya, sir, isa syang fake."

"dahil may anak ako sa kanya. yun, sir, ang pinanghahawakan nya sa akin, di raw pwede...dahil may anak kami."

"bat yung iba kahit nag-iba ang mga ugali nagtatagal naman?"

"kasi yung mga babae dependent sa asawa nila."

it brought to mind dong puno's discussion with his panel last night on kalibre 45: violence against women and children.

"sandali lang sir, bat ini-interview nyo ako ng ganun???"

"mag-aasawa na kasi ako..." the words that came out of my lips were clothed with solemnity, i could almost hear the church bells ringing. or so they thought. haha. 

"hindi nga, sir...?" t'joji's face beamed, pleasantly surprised.

"totoo, sir...?" a screw fell off from the grasp of the assistant.

both of them were head-to-head on the floor, peering under the table and cabinets, looking for the one screw that somehow got away.